What is the hardest thing you have ever experienced?

I have been avoiding this one because I don’t want to write about it.  I don’t want to talk about it and I don’t want to bring it up.  Most people already know so it’s no secret. But, I talked about it a lot when it first happened so I’m just tried of talking about it. Plus it’s dumb. Really dumb.

I’m only 22 years old so I haven’t been through much but  I have been through more than the normal 22 year old should. The hardest thing that I have experienced was getting my heart broken. I know it’s dumb, but it was and still is really hard for me.

I was in love with a guy.  No not was, I am in love with the guy but he didn’t/doesn’t feel the same.  When I was with him everything fell into place and everything seemed perfect. He was the first person that I truly trusted.  When I first met him we became instant friends and it just grew from there. Just laying around reading was amazing when I was with him.  Then everything changed so fast and I didn’t know how to handle it.  One day we were happy and the next day he broke it off.  It was devastating and my whole world was flipped upside down and came crashing down on top of me.

After the break up I got really sick and I lost over 20 pounds.  I almost lost my job and I lost a lot of my “friends”.  It was horrible. I would never wish heartbreak on anyone. It isn’t worth it. I cried myself to sleep every night for months.  Sometimes I still do.  I know that life goes on and time heals all wounds but the people who say those things are liars.  2 years later and it still hurts. Yes my life has gone on but that doesn’t mean that I have forgotten how that person made me feel.  It doesn’t mean that I don’t want that again.

This was the hardest thing I’ve been through so far but who knows what else life has in store for me.  After the break up I met some amazing people who I know will always be there when I need them.  If I wouldn’t have gone through that break up I know that I never would have met them and I wouldn’t be where I am right now and that would just be sad.